Tuesday, June 2, 2009

blogworthy "art"

I originally set out in my blogging career to archive the growth of the family and to celebrate milestones etc.... That's great and all but sometimes you encounter something that has little to do with the family or our lives, but it still has to be blogged.

I was in the patient room at the Rheumatologist waiting for the doctor to show up and I spotted the single most horrible piece of office art I have ever seen. It. Was. Hideous. Voila...for your viewing pleasure...
And here's a closeup. I wondered if it was just paper crumpled up and sprayed with a few splats of metallic spray paint to get that special turd effect. I had to touch it to see if it was metal or plastic. Nope. Its EXACTLY what I expected ...just crumpled grocery bag paper with a little paint and as ugly as sin. A few questions spring to mind: First, who sold this to you, Dr. Nardella? This mystery salesman's skills are valuable. A salesman who can sell a decorative turd to a doctor as art is a man who could sell anything. Ice to an eskimo. We need him at Frespa. If for nothing else, just to give us tips on proper placement for wall turd art, because I don't even know where to begin. Also to Dr. Nardella: I have a bridge in San Francisco you might be interested in buying
Rob looked at it and said, "yes, I can see the corn." gross and hilarious.

I wouldn't be so harsh on Dr. Nardella's horrible taste in office decor except that so far it seems his skills as a Rhematologist are summed up by looking at the aforementioned art. Crap. I have made the 100 mile round trip to north Scottsdale twice now and each time he refused to speak about possible diagnosis because he hadn't see every bit of the lab work yet. I asked him for his best guess without seeing the rest of the labs (he did have one set and all of the x-rays, afterall). He totally refused and acted offended that I would ask him to "make a wild guess." Its not really a wild guess though is it, when I am standing here and telling you in plain English what my symptoms are? "Well its probably Fibromyalgia". "Uh, okay, but the sources I have researched have all said that fibromyalgia is marked by widespread pain that does not swell or get hot and infected. And lets not forget the horrible disfiguring sores. His answer: "you don't have swelling and sores". Me: "I do. Thats the whole point! The joint swelling is out of control!" Dr. Dumbass: "Well I have to either see it or it has to come up on the labs to prove that it exists." Then there was this awkward moment when I realized that he just doesn't believe me. He thinks I'm making it up. He thinks I like paying a 35 dollar copay twice a month and driving 100 miles round trip while someone watches my baby and he won't get a nap, making my life hell. He thinks I'm a drama queen hypochondriac . HE THINKS I'M CRAZY. He was in such a hurry to get me out of the office too. I was trying to shove in symptoms while he was walking me to the door. "Did I mention that I am losing weight with out trying at an alarming rate?" "Well I guess we'll weigh you. Oh my, you have lost 8 pounds since May 12." I thought, "Finally! a verifiable symptom that he can't blow off." but then he said, "Don't worry, I noted it in the chart." That's a relief. Those charts diagnose and treat people all the time. Thank goodness for the miracle of modern charts.

My favorite part of the visit by far was this little exchange: Warning: there are personal details about my health condition that are not for the faint of heart.
Dr.: "Have you developed any new symptoms since I saw you last?"
Me: "Yes, I have developed severe bleeding hemmorhoids. I don't like to talk about it but its very painful."
Dr. "Wow, sounds awful. maybe you should see a doctor about that."
I'm no health detective, but damn. Isn't that exactly what I am doing right now at this very mother loving second?

Okay, I could go on and on about this guy, but suffice it to say I got into the elevator and burst into tears and then cried the whole way home. Its one thing to be sick, its another thing for doctors to think you are making it up. I have pictures, I have a log, I have other doctors who saw my condition and pushed narcotics on me with pity in their faces. I have a bottle of chemotherapy with my name on it that is starting to look better and better every day. And of course within hours of leaving this guy's office my hand began swelling up and if I walked in there right now he would have his "proof".


Courtney said...

Wow Staci, I am sorry! Let me know if you need me to watch your kids...gilbert isn't that far away from you!

Stephanie said...

I'm sorry Staci. Have you been to the Mayo clinic? Aren't they known for solving the unsolvable medical mysteries out there. The thing is that most medical crap is just a guess. It's a process of elimination. So start guessing and eliminating Doctor crap on your wall!!! I'm worried about you. It's not normal to drop weight without trying.... especially in our family! Don't give up. Keep bugging any doctor you can until they figure it out! Love you!

Stephanie said...

This is David. The Mayo clinic is great. I was have seizures and had a "Dr." tell me that I wasn't having them that it is all in my head. I left think I am amazing that I could run and actually think the right side of my body is freaking out. I went to the Mayo clinic and all they tried to do is find how to stop it.

Alice Jane said...

I was going to write and recommend the same thing as Stephanie and David...The Mayo Clinic. Have they looked into you possibly having RA? You really seem to have most of the symptoms. It is entirely possible to have RA, and have your blood tests come back negative for it. My doctor said the blood test is just one of many things they use to diagnose. When I am flaring with my RA, I lose weight too because I have really loose bowels (too much information, I know). The disease can make your internal organs swell too which can mess everything up. Hot, swollen, stiff, and achy joints are a big symptom. You will also feel very tired and weak. Make sure you let your doctor know that you have a family history of RA (Grandma and 3 cousins). RA is a hereditary disease.

I really hope you get feeling better soon. I hope they are at least giving you a prescription anti-inflammatory (over the counter drugs are crap) . That can really help no matter what the diagnosis is.

Email me your phone number again. I accidentally erased it.

Brittney said...

poor staci, what a total nightmare! i am so sorry for whats been goin on with you...all i can do is pray that you will find the answers you seek, and find a dr who isnt a total IDIOT!!

Megan said...

Dude...you've got all this crap going on(pun intended) and you're offering to babysit my kids?? I don't think so girl. Not on my watch. You and the boys need to come play! And you should especially come to Tami's play group on Tuesday! We missed you this week.

If you really want to do something though, we will gladly accept donations of the Costco Kirtland brand two pack of baby formula. That's what the orphanage uses and I'll be bringing as much as we can possibly carry without going over the weight limit.

So, now I ask you...What can I do to help YOU?

The Jacobs said...

I'm going to repeat what most everyone has said..Mayo Clinic. They are even on many insurances. They are the ones we're working with for my mom's kidney transplant and they have been phenomenal!

Anonymous said...

have you talked to raina recentley?
i am calling you today

Amanda said...

That sucks, Staci. I'm sorry.

guineadski said...

I wanted to leave a message full of righteous indignation to tell you that you must be on crack because my blog IS public. But now I feel bad because your sick. Poor Haws. Maybe, I'll check again, just to make you feel better. love ya

Mom said...

Brenda's mom here. Sorry we missed you last week (when we brought Brenda her boy and her stuff) and VERY sorry to hear how not useful your doctor is! Are these "uncharted symptoms" photo-able? Can you get someone to get pics of the sores and swelling? I vote for the Mayo also! Wish I knew how to help.

Christy said...

So been there, Staci. Different symptoms, same story. I may be biased, but people who aren't say my Rheumatologist friend is really good. She has the rare combination of caring and knowing what she is doing. It may be worth a drive to Tucson. And the nurse practitioner I saw last spent two hours with me and is helping me a lot. Let me know if you want either of their info. Good luck.

Dani said...

First of all...you are the greatest writer ever! I love reading your posts.
Second of all, I am so sorry about everything you're going through. I can sympathize with you on the annoying, dumber-than-a-stick doctors. They are the worst leave you nothing to do but cry all the way home. I cannot tell you how sorry I am! I wish we lived closer and I could help out. Good luck, and I hope you can find a new dr...it's the worst when you HATE the specialist you're seeing and feel trapped. Lots of prayers and cyber-hugs coming your way!


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