Sloppy Joes. Slop, Sloppy Joes

The big day came. Jack earned 5 smileys (finally through honest means) and I went to his school for lunch. I have no pictures of the event because I forgot to bring the camera. I am kicking myself because there are a couple of things that I would like to have captured forever on pixels. First, it would be the look on Jack's face when he saw me there in the lunch line. Pure and utter elation mixed with surprise and unparalleled love. I get goosebumps just thinking about how happy he was to see me. He wanted me there more than anything. I love these kids I'm raising so much and to see the reciprocation in his chubby little face was almost enough to make me cry.

The second thing I would have liked to capture on camera was this little blonde girl in his class who has a crush on him. He has been telling me that there is a "girl who won't stop chasin' me on the playground." and I have explained to him that that's how some little girls show you they like you- by chasing you. "Oh, I already know her likes me. Her tells me every minute that her likes me. Her won't leave me alone. Her is so annoying." (Yes, Jack has yet to master the proper use of the pesky pronouns she vs. her. Perhaps this is what makes him irresistible to women his age)

I had wondered if Jack was exaggerating about this little girl and her obsession for him. When he came walking into the lunchroom, there was indeed a tiny little blonde all up in Jack's personal space. They came walking through the line and she was trying to hold hands with him and put her head on his shoulder and touch his face. He was totally irritated and kept trying to brush her off which seemed to make her try harder. When she met me and discovered that I'm Jacks mommy she got really excited and said "I REALLY like your boy! Your boy is the best boy in class! Sometimes I chase him and sometimes he lets me hold his hands and touch his face like this!" then she reached over to caress Jack's red cheeks and hardly noticed that her hand got batted away. The thing is, this little chick is adorable. She will be a KNOCKOUT hottie is about 10 years. Jack has no patience for her affection right now, but I guarantee he won't be nearly as irritated come 2019. I told her that I really like Jack too and commended her for her nice taste in men. I was about to make a comment about how if the two of them grow up and get married they will have the prettiest blonde haired blue eyed grand babies in the world. I stopped myself because A) its just inappropriate. And B) I want Jack to enjoy my lunch visits and this kind of motherly embarassment is a bad road to start down. It was interesting to see my five year old as a romantic target.

The lunch went well. We were served Sloppy Joes by hairnetted lunchladies. The most iconic of all school lunches served by the most iconic lunchroom people. They could have passed for exactly the same people that served me lunch everyday from 1982 to 1988 at Park Meadows Elementary School. Some things have changed, like disposable lunch trays and utensils instead of the dirty dish conveyor belt, and all of the money exchanged is from a credit card, instead of those paper punch cards that were so advanced when I was a kid. Also they have abandoned the practice of handwashing in favor of hand sanitizer gel, which sends a shiver down my motherly spine. But most of the school lunch experience is exactly how I remember it.

This time around I was horrified by the mass quantity of food that was left uneaten and thrown out. My instinct was to wrap it all up for leftovers and lecture everyone about eating the healthy stuff in addition to the rice crispy treat, but my kid ate it all and wasted very little so I kept my mouth shut. I'm just saying, we could probably solve the hunger problem in some nations by digging through the trash for leftovers at this school. It is such a waste of food I can't even think about it.

At the end, the teacher came by the table and released the children to recess. Jack was pretty excited to go play and he ran off without even saying goodbye. Blondie was right on his heels so he had to run pretty fast. I know he loved having me there and I can't wait to go again. Jack is now working on filling a chart with SIX smileys to earn a visit from DADDY. If he is really good dad will wear his police uniform and show the kids his tazer and handcuffs. Pretty awesome if you ask me.